the man we want & THE MAN We Need

A few months ago, hundreds of thousands of men were among the 2 million people gathered in our nation’s capitol to witness the inauguration of President Barack Obama. I wasn’t one of those blessed to be there bodily, but my spirit was there.

Before you dismiss this as New Age psychobabble (out of body experiences, etc.), please continue reading. It’s not what it at first may appear.

For decades, I have wanted a man. Not a father (I had my own for more than 41 years). Not a role model (image is nothing). Not a hero (nobody’s perfect). Not a group (one who has no other has no one though he may be with many).

I’ve just wanted a man.

Up until recently, I was always made to feel embarrassed, guilty, and somewhat twisted for daring to even voice that desire. Yet as I now see it, all of us want a man. As a matter of fact, it’s a God-given desire for God was the first Person to want a man (why else would He have made one?).

Furthermore, the man God made in His image wanted a man, too! That’s why God built him a woman. The woman God built was part of that man. That man was part of God. So the desire to have a man has never really been an issue (contrary to what some conservative politicians and religious fundamentalists want everyone to accept).

The real question was why did I want a man? For what purpose did I desire to have a man in my life?

I had to look inside myself long and hard for the answer to that one. I’ve seen how we men relate to each other (and to women, children, and animals). Not always a pretty picture! Some of what I saw and experienced made me wonder why anyone – male or female – would want a man!

Ever since the Fall, men have wanted other men for the wrong reasons. The men of ancient Sodom and Gomorrah wanted men to “know” (sexually abuse) them. Goliath the Philistine wanted a man of Israel to fight with him. To this day, it seems that sex and/or violence are the primary reasons why men want to get together. I don’t believe those are the original reasons why God has always wanted a man.

In answer to my question, I found that I wanted a man for the same reasons that I believe God wanted a man: just to be with. Not to whip into submission or servitude. Not to intimidate or coerce. Not to manipulate or control. Not to compete with or condemn.

God wanted a man to be with so He could see Himself in the eyes of someone He knew and cared about. He wanted a man to share things with, to enjoy the creation with. He wanted a man to understand Him, delight in being with Him, and – most of all – to love Him.

When God came to Earth searching for a man, He came as the Son of Man who wanted men to be with Him. Even so, I wanted a man to be with me. Not merely be around me. With me. For me. No matter how I may behave from time to time. No matter what I might say or do or think. I wanted a man who, as a friend, would love me at all times and a brother who would hang close through adversity.

In my deep desire for a man, I’ve said and done some things that made me appear weak, strange and foolish. So has God. Jesus said some things (“Eat My flesh and drink My blood” come to mind) and did some things (washing feet, getting Himself killed on purpose) in His desire to have a man. Even His own disciples didn’t understand. Any man who dares to follow his desire for other men usually meets suspicion, fear, rejection, hatred, violence and sometimes, death.

The few men I occasionally connected with for a period wound up betraying, denying and forsaking me (sound familiar?). Still, I wouldn’t allow the pain of past disappointments to kill my quest to have a man. Instead, I prayed, “Father, give me a man.”

And He has. God has given me His Son, but with His Son He has also given me a man: me. God has given me manhood and identified me as a man. I’ve found the man I wanted all these years was living inside of me all the time.

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Through Christ, I am discovering and becoming the man for whom I was longing and searching. And as I’m finding the man in me, I am able to give myself more freely to other men, women, and children to whom God is giving me so that they, too, can find THE MAN within themselves and give that man away.

Amazingly, as I give myself to the men in my life without expecting anything in return, they in turn are giving themselves to me. I’m getting what I want by giving what I need.

That’s why I said earlier that I was in Washington, D.C. with those men even though I wasn’t there bodily. Those men are me and I am those men. We are all just one man: Christ.

Do you want a man? Go to Jesus. Then give yourself away to mankind. In doing so, you will find all the man (men) you will ever want and need.

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